第三辑 为人处世 Volume 3: Dealing with People
我们尊重每个人，首先，应该从尊重自己的家人开始。
We respect everyone, and first and foremost, it should begin with respecting our own family members.
一个男人，如果你母亲跟你妻子的婆媳关系不好，你自己就要反省，问题肯定出在你身上。
As a man, if the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship between your mother and wife is strained, you need to introspect; the issue undoubtedly lies with you.
首先，你对母亲不够尊重，不够孝顺，妻子看到你这种对母亲的态度，会潜移默化，有样学样，对你的母亲也不够尊重和孝顺。儿子这种态度，母亲能够忍受，但是媳妇的这种态度，母亲就不愿忍受了，就容易产生矛盾冲突了。
Firstly, your lack of respect and filial piety towards your mother sends a message to your wife. Observing your attitude towards your mother, she may unconsciously mimic it and consequently show insufficient respect and filial piety towards her too. While a mother might endure her son's attitude, she might not be willing to endure such an attitude from her daughter-in-law, leading to conflicts and contradictions.
同样，如果你对妻子也不够尊重，轻慢她，经常骂呀、吵呀，你母亲看到了你对妻子的态度，也会不尊重她，欺负她。
Similarly, if you also lack respect for your wife, belittle her, and frequently engage in arguing or scolding, your mother might also lack respect for her and mistreat her observing your behavior towards your wife.
另一方面，当妻子受了丈夫的欺负，有气没处发，就会找你母亲挑刺，把怨气发到你母亲身上，跟你母亲发生矛盾和冲突。有的男人在母亲面前对老婆太过宠爱，让母亲感受到被冷落，母亲也会觉得儿子被人抢跑了，潜意识里也会嫉妒，然后就会挑媳妇的毛病。给媳妇的脸色看，矛盾激化，慢慢的，爆发家庭战争。
On the other hand, when a wife faces mistreatment from her husband and has no outlet for her frustrations, she might vent her anger by finding faults with your mother, directing her resentment towards her and causing conflicts and clashes. Some men excessively favor their wives in front of their mothers, which can make the mother feel neglected. This might lead the mother to feel as if her son is being taken away from her and subconsciously lead to jealousy. Consequently, she might start pointing out flaws in the daughter-in-law. This can worsen the tension, gradually escalating into family conflicts.
还有一种男人，比较懦弱，当婆媳发生矛盾冲突的时候，他会保持沉默，不说话，甚至走开不管。这样矛盾就会越闹越大，最后不可调和。
There's another type of man who is rather timid. When conflicts arise between his mother and wife, he remains silent, refrains from speaking, or even walks away. This approach can escalate the conflicts further, ultimately leading to irreconcilable conflicts.
有智慧的男人不会这样，当婆媳发生矛盾的时候，他当面肯定会站在母亲这边，尊重老人，即使是母亲无理取闹，当面也会假装呵斥妻子；背后，再安慰自己的妻子，化解矛盾。一个女人嫁到你家里也不容易，需要相夫教子，孝顺公婆。如果她得不到应有的尊重，要做到家庭和睦是不可能的。
A wise man behaves differently. When conflicts arise between his mother and wife, he will stand by his mother's side in front of her, showing respect to the elder. Even if his mother is being unreasonable, he will pretend to scold his wife in front of her. However, behind the scenes, he will console his wife and work to resolve the conflicts. It's not easy for a woman to become part of your family; she needs to adapt to the family's ways and show filial piety to her in-laws. If she doesn't receive the respect she deserves, achieving harmony in the family is unlikely.
记住：家和万事兴。
Remember: A harmonious family leads to prosperity in all aspects.
易明之光 Mini读书@2023