第五辑 生命教育 Volume 5: Life Education
一个朋友的孩子大学毕业半年了，没有去找工作，窝在家里，白天睡觉，晚上上网。最近跟他父母要钱，想去国外游学。朋友来问我该不该让他去？
A friend's child has graduated from college for half a year but hasn’t started looking for a job, staying at home, sleeping during the day, surfing the Internet at night. Recently, he asked his parents for money and said he wanted to study abroad. My friend came to me and asked whether he should let him go.
我望着他苍苍的白发说：“你如果真的要为孩子好，就让他去，但是不要给他钱。”
I looked at his gray hair and said, "If you truly want the best for your child, let him go, but don't give him money."
我想到了我妹夫的故事。
I thought of my brother-in-law's story.
他从小就向往外面的世界，高中一毕业就先去阿拉斯加伐木存钱，但父母并不给他钱，他也没向家里要。
He had always yearned for the outside world since his childhood. After graduating from high school, he first went to Alaska to work to save money in logging. However, his parents didn't give him money, and he didn't ask for it.
阿拉斯加夏天日照很长， 太阳到午夜才落下，三点多又升上来了，他一天如果工作16个小时，伐一季木的工资可以让他环游世界。
In Alaska, the summer days are long, with the sun setting around midnight and rising again at three in the morning. If he worked 16 hours a day for a season, the earnings would allow him to travel around the world.
他在走遍世界两年之后才回到大学去念书，因为是在自己深思熟虑之下才决定念的科系，所以三年就把四年的学分修完，出来就业。
After traveling the world for two years, he returned to university to pursue his studies. Since he chose the major after careful consideration, he completed the credits for a four-year program in three years. Upon graduating, he entered the workforce.
他工作得很顺利，可以说平步青云，一直做到总工程师。
His career progressed smoothly, and it can be said that he ascended quickly through the ranks, eventually becoming the chief engineer.
有一次，妹夫告诉我一个小故事，说那件事情影响了他的一生：
One time, my brother-in-law told me a little story, saying that the incident had a profound impact on his entire life.
他在阿拉斯加打工时，在山上，曾经与一个朋友听到狼的嗥叫声，他们很紧张地四处搜寻，结果发现是一只母狼，脚被捕兽器夹住，正在哀嚎。
While working in Alaska on a mountain, he and a friend once heard a wolf howling, they searched around nervously, then found that it was a female wolf caught in a trap with her feet, howling in distress.
他知道那个捕兽器是一名老工人的，他业余捕兽，卖毛皮补贴家用，但这名老人因心脏病已被直升机送到安克瑞契医院去急救了，这只母狼会因为没有人处理而饿死。
He knew that the trap belonged to an elderly worker who engaged in trapping as a hobby, selling furs to supplement his income. However, due to a heart attack, the old man had been airlifted to the Anchorage Hospital for emergency treatment. With no one to attend to it, the mother wolf was at risk of starving to death.
他想释放母狼，但母狼很凶，他无法靠近。他又发现母狼在滴乳，表示狼穴中还有小狼。他与同伴费了九牛二虎之力找到了狼穴，将4只小狼抱到母狼处吃奶，以免饿死。
He wanted to free the she-wolf, but she was so aggressive, and he could not get closer. Upon closer inspection, he noticed the she-wolf was lactating, indicating the presence of wolf cubs in a den. With great effort, he and his companion managed to locate the den and bring the four wolf cubs to their mother to feed, preventing them from starving.
他把自己的食物分给母狼吃，以维持母狼的生命。晚上还呆在母狼附近露营，保护这个狼家庭，因为母狼被夹住了，无法自卫。
He shared his food with the mother wolf to sustain her life. He even camped near the mother wolf at night to protect this wolf family, as the mother wolf was trapped and was unable to defend herself.
一直到第5天，他去喂食时，发现母狼的尾巴稍微摇了一摇，他知道自己已开始获得它的信任啦。又过了三天，母狼才让他靠近到可以把兽夹松开，把它释放出来。
When he went to feed her on the fifth day, he noticed a slight wagging of the mother wolf’s tail. He knew that he had started to gain her trust. After another three days, the mother wolf finally allowed him to approach closely enough to release the trap and set her free.
自由后，母狼舐了他的手，让他替它的脚上药后，才带着小狼走开，一路还频频回头望他。
Once she was freed, the mother wolf licked his hand and allowed him to apply medicine to her injured foot. Then, with her four wolf cubs, she walked away, looking back at him frequently as they departed.
他坐在大石头上想，如果人类可以让凶猛的野狼来舐他的手，成为朋友，难道就不能让另一个人放下武器成为朋友吗？
He sat on a large rock, pondering: If humans can make fierce wild wolves lick their hands and become friends, can't we convince another person to set aside their weapons and become friends?
他决定以后先对别人表现诚意，因为从这件事中看到，先释放出诚意，对方一定会以诚相报。 从此，他在公司中以诚待人，每年都升一级，进步得很快。最重要的是，他每天都过得很充实快乐。
He decided that in the future, he would first show sincerity to others because, from this experience, he saw that by extending genuine goodwill, the other party would surely respond in kind. From then on, he treated colleagues with sincerity in the company, and as a result, he received a promotion every year, progressing rapidly. What’s most important is that he lives a joyous life every day.
他说，助人的人是比被助的人还要快乐的人。妹夫对我说，他一直很感谢阿拉斯加的经验，因为这使他一生受用不尽。
He said those who help others are even happier than those who are helped. My brother-in-law told me that he is always grateful for the Alaska experience because it has been invaluable throughout his life.
的确，下过霜的柿子才会甜，人也是经过磨炼才会成熟，而且他知道了自己应该珍惜什么。
Indeed, frosted persimmons are the sweetest, just like people mature through trials and learn to cherish what truly matters.
所以，如果一个人大学毕业了还不知道自己要什么，那么应该让他去外面磨炼一下，让他自食其力。
Therefore, if someone graduates from college without knowing what they want, they should be exposed to the outside world, where they can self-reliantly face challenges.
现在很多家庭娇惯、宠溺孩子，捧在手里怕摔了，含在嘴里怕化了。当父母恨不得把全世界所有的好东西和所有的爱都给孩子时，却忘了告诉孩子一件事：生活的艰辛，是难以想象的。
Nowadays, many families pamper and indulge their children, holding them so carefully as if they were afraid they might fall, cherishing them as if they were afraid they might melt in their mouths. When parents wish to give all the good things and all the love in the world to their children, they often forget to tell them one crucial message: the hardships of life are beyond imagination.
父母的过度“呵护”，对于孩子们来说，无疑是一味“毒药”啊。 孩子们心安理得享受着一切，根本不知道知足、感恩和体贴父母，更不知道生活的不容易。相反，还滋生了很多的虚荣、懒惰的坏毛病。
The excessive "care" from parents is undoubtedly a kind of "poison" for children. Children, who enjoy everything without understanding contentment, gratitude, and consideration for their parents, are often unaware of the difficulties of life. On the contrary, this excessive pampering tends to foster vanity and laziness and cultivate habits in the process.
为人父母，大都希望能为孩子遮风挡雨，扫清他前进路上一切的障碍，给孩子一个平安喜乐的人生。
As parents, most wish to shield their children from life's hardships, remove all obstacles from their path, and provide them with a safe and joyful life.
然而，命运无常，世事百态，父母无法做孩子一世的拐杖。适当放手，让孩子不断历练，具有抵挡风雨的力量，有智慧有能力过好自己的生活，这才是为人父母最明智的选择。
However, fate is unpredictable, and the world is full of uncertainties. Parents cannot be a lifelong crutch for their children. Letting go of children, allowing them to experience and grow, fostering the strength to withstand life's challenges, and equipping them with the wisdom and capability to lead their own lives, is the wisest choice for parents.
梁启超曾说：“一个人在物质上的享用，只要能维持着生命便够了。至于快乐与否，全不是物质上可以支配的。我想，有志气的孩子，总应该往吃苦的路上走。能在困苦中求快活，才真是会打算盘哪。”
Liang Qichao once said, "As long as one can sustain life materially, it is sufficient. Whether one is happy or not is entirely beyond the control of material possessions. I think that ambitious children should always tread the path of hardship. Being able to find happiness in adversity is a true sign of resilience."
物质生活的富裕只是暂时的，父母不可能照顾孩子一辈子。给孩子提供再好的生活环境，都不如让他去体验生活的不易。
Material prosperity is only temporary, and parents cannot take care of their children forever. Providing a good living environment for children, it is not as valuable as letting them experience the challenges of life.
父母要舍得放下，悟到对孩子最好的保护就是不保护，给他一个机会去证明自己、体验人生，相信他也能从中得到一生受用不尽的经验哪。
Parents should be willing to let go, and realize that the best protection for their children is not to overprotect. Giving them an opportunity to prove themselves and experience life, will provide them with invaluable experiences that will last a lifetime.
易明之光 Mini读书@2023